05/08/2025, 4:17

I feel closest to you when I’m flipping through the pages of your journal.

When I press my fingers against the ink, it’s like pressing my fingers against your skin. It makes me tear up, then I feel stupid and the appropriate amount of reverent at the same time.

My stomach aches, I’m bloated, and my hair looks like a complete mess. I feel like a fat, ugly, smear on the planet and I worry that’s what you’ll see when you see me.